Editor: DebsSweet
Graphic Editors: Ditziexx, LuvintheCountry,
CrispySue, Kittykab
SPAM
Odd - I received an email to myself that I didn't send! Please
do not open any emails from me that you aren't
sure of -- it's probably not me!
This is ridiculous. I feel sorry for people who have nothing better
to do than hack computers and ruin everything they can. It's
really pathetic.
I received lots of emails from my subscribers who were glad I'm
back with R & R - I thank you so very much! I am overwhelmed with
your kindness and for taking time out to write me!
I won't be doing this weekly until I figure how to fix AOL so it
doesn't quadruple space when I want to singlespace! ugh!
If you would like to SIGN UP or BE REMOVED from this mailing list,
please send an email
to me at AOL and your request will be handled promptly.
Kick up your feet and put your problems behind you cause darlin' it's
time to ROCK AND ROLL!
- and don't forget to buckle your seatbelts, cause it's going to be a
wild ride!
"My girlfriend is
such a cheat and a liar. I've been going with her
almost a year now, and I never would have known she was married
until my wife mentioned it just the other day."
v v v v v
Milan, Paris, New York, Alabama?
The Top 9 Differences If the
Fashion World
Was
Centered Around Alabama
9> Strapless fashions would disappear as bib coveralls need at
least one strap to stay on.
8> Everyone lined up next to the runway would be eating pork
rinds.
7> Vogue is now named "Vogue, y'all."
6> Cosmopolitan Magazine cover stories on "How to Explain Your
Family Tree."
5> Jeff Gordon wins the Talladega 500 wearing Vera Wang.
4> New this year: Jimmy Choo Steel-Toed Boots collection.
3> Instead of traditional runways, the fashion models circle an
oval and make occasional pit stops.
2> Dolce & Gabbana's juniors line would have a much wider
maternity selection.
and the Number 1 Difference If the
Fashion
World Was Centered
Around Alabama...
1> "Daddy Proof" Training Bras.
v v v v v
Computer users doing Google searches during a nearly one-hour period Saturday were greeted with
disturbing but erroneous messages that every site turned up in the results might be harmful.
The company blamed the mistake on human error and apologized for any inconvenience caused to
users and site owners whose pages were incorrectly labeled.
The glitch occurred between 6:30 a.m. and 7:25 a.m., Google Inc. said in
Cyber Security
Tip ST06-005
Dealing with Cyberbullies
Bullies are now taking advantage of technology to intimidate and
harass
their victims. Dealing with cyberbullying can be difficult, but
there are
steps you can take.
What is cyberbullying?
Cyberbullying refers to the new, and growing, practice of using
technology
to harass, or bully, someone else. Bullies used to be restricted
to methods
such as physical intimidation, postal
mail, or the telephone. Now,
developments in electronic media offer forums such as
email, instant
messaging, web pages, and digital photos to add to the arsenal.
Computers,
cell phones, and PDAs are new tools that can be applied to an old
practice.
Forms of cyberbullying can range in severity from cruel or
embarrassing
rumors to threats, harassment, or stalking. It can affect any age
group;
however, teenagers and young adults are common victims, and
cyberbullying is
a growing problem in schools.
Why has cyberbullying become such a problem?
The relative anonymity of the internet is appealing for bullies
because it
enhances the intimidation and makes tracing the activity more
difficult.
Some bullies also find it easier to be more vicious because there
is no
personal contact. Unfortunately, the internet and email can also
increase
the visibility of the activity. Information or pictures posted
online or
forwarded in mass emails can reach a larger audience faster
than more
traditional methods, causing more damage to the victims. And
because of the
amount of personal information available online, bullies may be
able to
arbitrarily choose their victims.
Cyberbullying may also indicate a tendency toward more serious
behavior.
While bullying has always been an unfortunate reality, most
bullies grow out
of it. Cyberbullying has not existed long enough to have solid
research, but
there is evidence that it may be an early warning for more violent
behavior.
How can you protect yourself?
* Be careful where you post personal information - By
limiting the number
of people who have access to your contact
information or details about
your interests, habits, or employment, you reduce
your exposure to
bullies that you do not know. This may limit your
risk of becoming a
victim and may make it
easier to identify the bully if you are
victimized.
* Avoid escalating the situation - Responding with
hostility is likely to
provoke a bully and
escalate the situation. Depending on the
circumstances, consider ignoring the issue. Often,
bullies thrive on the
reaction of their victims. Other options include
subtle actions. For
example, if you are receiving unwanted email
messages, consider changing
your email address. If the bully does
not have access to the new
address, the problem may stop. If you continue to
get messages at your
new account, you may have a stronger case for legal
action.
* Document the activity - Keep a record of any online
activity (emails,
web pages, instant messages, etc.), including
relevant dates and times.
In addition to archiving an electronic version,
consider printing a
copy.
* Report cyberbullying to the appropriate authorities - If
you are being
harassed or threatened, report the activity to the
local authorities.
Law enforcement agencies have different policies,
but your local police
department or FBI branch are good starting points.
Unfortunately, there
is a distinction between free speech and punishable
offenses, but the
legal implications should be decided by the law
enforcement officials
and the prosecutors.
Depending on the activity, it may also be
appropriate to report it to school officials who may
have separate
policies for dealing with activity that involves
students.
Protect your children by teaching them good online habits (see
Keeping
Children Safe Online for more information). Keep lines of
communication open
with your children so that they feel comfortable telling you if
they are
being victimized online. Reduce their risk of becoming
cyberbullies by
setting guidelines for and monitoring their use of the internet
and other
electronic media (cell phones, PDAs, etc.).
As the CFO of this business
that employees 140 people, I have
resigned myself to the fact that Barrack Obama is our next President,
and that our taxes and government fees will increase in a BIG way.
To compensate for these increases, I figure that the clients will
have to see an increase in our fees to them of about 8%. But since we
cannot increase our fees right now due to the dismal state of our
economy, we will have to lay off six of our employees instead. This
has really been eating at me for a while, as we believe we are
family here and I didn't Know how to choose who will have to go.
So, this is what I did. I strolled thru our parking lot and found 8
Obama bumper stickers on our employees' cars and have decided these
folks will be the first to be laid off. I can't think of a more
fair way to approach this problem. These folks wanted change; I
gave it to them.
v v v v v
FLR2D2
v v v v v
BADVETTE87
When the Mexican
finishes his beer, he throws his glass in the air, pulls
out his pistol, and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, "In Mexico , our
glasses are so cheap we don't need to drink with the same one twice."
The Arab, obviously impressed by this, drinks his beer, throws it into
the
air, pulls out his AK-47, and shoots the glass to pieces. He says, "In
the
Arab World, we have so much sand to make glasses that we don't need to
drink with the same one twice either."
The redneck girl, cool as a cucumber, picks up her beer, downs it in one
gulp, throws the glass into the air, whips out her 45, and shoots the
Mexican and the Arab. Catching her glass, setting it on the bar, and
calling for a refill, she says,
"In America we have so many illegal aliens that we don't have to
drink
with the same ones twice."
v v v v v
v v v v v
The Top 9 18th-Century Product Warning
Labels
9> Not to be used in combination with any other Old Wives' Tale
remedy.
8> Results are dramatic! Failure to fake symptoms for a few days
after treatment may result in being burned at the stake.
7> Please consult your clergyman or barber if you sprout a third
arm or turn into a frog.
6> Tis advised that though shalt not ride thine horse,
participate in a duel, nor feed the pigs until you hast
checked how this balm affects thy brain.
5> For treetment of Symptomf only. DOTH NOT ELIMINATE ILL
HUMOURS!
4> Produced in yon Facilitie which also yet produceth tallow,
glue, asafoetida, sinew, hydes &c.
3> Tis meant to clean the innards. Have pisspot at the ready.
2> Perchest thou stoutly this chamber pot, lest thy mongrel's
frolic o'erturn it.
and the Number 1 18th-Century Product Warning Label ...
1> Containeth Parts and Subftances which may present a Hazzard to
ye wee Children. Much as every other Thing in this our breef
and unhappy Lyfe, by ye Wille of God.
v v v v v
KP1983
Eggplant Patties
Ingredients:
1 large eggplant
1 egg
3 cups seasoned bread crumbs
5 tablespoons grated cheese
1 small garlic clove, minced
1 cup vegetable oil,
pinches of oregano,
basil leaves, crushed red pepper, salt, pepper
Directions
Boil eggplant with skin on until very soft. ( about 20 min)
Drain well till there's NO WATER in it
Mash in a large bowl.
Add all ingredients (except oil) and mix.
Heat oil in frying pan.
Shape eggplant mixture into patties and fry on both sides until brown.
Now if you wish, you can add your sauce and cheese and melt ontop to
make it into a Parm instead of just fried patties..
Enjoy!!!
v v v v v
submitted by DeVulcano
This is such a wonderful site --- great message!
Another great site from my friend!
Send hugs to your friends
v v v v v
A man goes to a
whorehouse and asks the lady at the desk for a woman
with a fantastic tan with no tan lines.
The lady at the desk says, "That will be $500.00." So the man gives
her the money and she tells him to go up stairs and knock on the
third door on left.
A voice tells him to come in. He does.
She says, "Take your clothes off."
He said, "I paid $500, so I want you to take your clothes off and
lay on the bed and spread your legs for me."
She does. He says "Thank you," and starts to leave.
She said, "Is that all you wanted?"
He replies, "Yes. My wife is painting the house brown with pink
shutters and I just wanted to see what it would look like."
v v v v v
"This year,
taxpayers will receive an Economic Stimulus Payment. This
is a very exciting new program that I will explain using the Q and A
format:
"Q. What is an Economic Stimulus Payment?
"A. It is money that the federal government will send
to taxpayers.
"Q. Where will the government get this money?
"A. From taxpayers.
"Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
"A. Only a smidgen.
"Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
"A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase
a
high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.
"Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China?
"A. Shut up."
v v v v v
jacksinfla
v v v v v
Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US
economy by
spending your stimulus check wisely:
If you spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go
to China.
If you spend it on gasoline it will go to the Arabs.
If you purchase a computer it will go to India.
If you purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico,
Honduras, and Guatemala (unless you buy organic).
If you buy a car it will go to Japan.
If you purchase useless crap it will go to Taiwan.
And none of it will help the American economy.
We need to keep that money here in America. You can keep the
money
in America by spending it at yard sales, going to a baseball game, or
spending it on prostitutes, beer (domestic ONLY), or tattoos, since
those are the only businesses still in the US.
v v v v v
v v v v v
Gentlemen:
I have just received your letter in regards to the bill I owe you.
You said the bill should have been paid long ago and you don't
understand why it wasn't. Well, I will enlighten you.
In 1957 I bought a sawmill on credit. In 1959 I bought an ox team, a timber
cart and two ponies; a shotgun, a wine tester, a Colt revolver and
five razorback hogs all on credit. In 1960 the sawmill burned down.
One of my ponies died and the other I loaned to a son-of-a-bitch who
starved him to death.
In 1961 my father died and my mother was hung for horse rustling. A
mechanic named Joe knocked up my daughter and I had to pay the
doctor $88.32 to keep the bastard from becoming a relative of mine.
In 1963 my son had the mumps and they went down on him; the doctor
had to castrate him to save his life. That summer I went fishing and
the boat turned over and I lost the biggest catfish you ever saw,
and one of my sons drowned (not the castrated one).
In 1966 my wife ran away with another feller and left me with the
three small children as a souvenir. I married the hired girl to keep
down expenses, but I had trouble getting her off, and the doctor
told me to try to create some excitement just as she was beginning
to get aroused. That night I pointed the shotgun out the window
while we were in bed and just as she was beginning to orgasm I
pulled the trigger. Well, she shit the bed, I ruptured myself and
killed the best damn milk cow I ever had.
The next year my troubles really started. My wife caught the clap from
the ice man, my son wiped his ass with a corn cob with poison ivy on
it, and someone de-nutted my best bull.
In 1970 I decided to go into another business on my own. I ordered
six bee hives from Sears, Roebuck, and Company. I bought a swarm of
bees and a queen bee all on credit on the installment plan. The
queen bee died and I ordered another one. She turned out to be a
whore and started running around with a horsefly. The honey tasted
like shit so I couldn't sell it.
So now, gentlemen, you say if I do not pay you, you will cause me
trouble. Right now if it costs two cents to shit, I'd have to puke.
Getting money out of me would be like trying to poke butter up a
wildcat's ass with a hot trowel, but you are welcome to try.
Yours for more credit,
Max
v v v v v
If your computer has been experiencing performance problems lately, you are likely wondering if your
computer has been infected by a worm or a virus. Self-education is a great way to start when you are
troubleshooting your computer. Once you understand what the possible causes of your performance problems are,
you are that much better equipped to repair things and get on with your computing life.
v v v v v
"Larry King announced that he's going to write an autobiography
titled 'What Am I Doing Here?' Larry says that if the book sells,
he's got plans for several sequels including, 'What Day is This? and
Where Are My Pants?'"
Conan O'Brien
v v v v v
"I want to get this off my chest: For the past 20 years, I have
been using performance-enhancing vodka."
David Letterman
v v v v v
"I got a good tip from my stockbroker the other day. He said, 'For
only 39 cents, I can super size those fries for you.'"
Jay Leno
v v v v v
The Top 9 Things You'd Do First If Your SO Went
Missing
9> Oh, who are you kidding? As long as dinner is on the table,
you'll never notice WHO puts it there.
8> Check the john a second time. Sometimes we guys get sucked
temporarily into a different dimension in there.
7> Race to your nearest priest to find if you're really on the
hook for this whole "selling your soul" thing.
6> Start dusting off all your unfulfilled hopes and dreams and
keep your fingers crossed.
5> Buy a lottery ticket, because, hey, your luck seems to be
turning around!
4> Tear the house apart looking for him or, barring that, the
insurance policies.
3> Start whistling your favorite munchkin house-drop tune.
2> The glorious return of Pants-less Thursdays!
and the Number 1
Thing You'd Do
First If Your SO
Went Missing...
1> Call the police, transform "crafts" room into a sports den,
and buy a dog. Not necessarily in that order.
v v v v v
http://www.lockergnome.com/windows/2008/10/21/mystery-chronicles-murder-among-friends/
Murder and mistrust abound in the town of Lyon in the year 1899. Trail an elusive killer through
the back roads of France, and solve clever puzzles to halt the terror! Comb locations like libraries,
museums, graveyards, and sewers for hidden objects and clues.
Test your deduction skills and don’t be fooled by false sincerity. Danger is afoot
US Airways pilot Chesley "Sully" Sullenberger's heroic splash landing into the River Hudson
earlier this month saved dozens of lives and was heralded as a miracle.
Now a team of developers has created an online video game that lets users try their hand at his landing.
The game is set on the approach to the Hudson River, alongside Manhattan's west side,
where the plane touched down in icy waters
v v v v v
Thanks to the taxation we are subjected to, the question "Paper
or plastic?" now refers to many American's sleeping arrangements!
v v v v v
LIGHTER TIRAMISU
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
INGREDIENTS:
8 ounces semi sweet chocolate, finely chopped
1/4 cup fat free egg substitute
1 cup sugar
1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla
1 8-ounce package fat free cream cheese, cut into small pieces
1 8-ounce frozen light whipped topping, thawed
1 tablespoon instant espresso powder
1/4 cup hot water
1 cup cold water
1 fat free pound cake, cut into 1/2 inch slices
DIRECTIONS:
(food processor can be used to finely chop chocolate ahead
of time and set aside). In food processor with metal blade,
process egg substitute and sugar for 30 seconds. Add vanilla;
process 1 minute or until pale yellow. Add cream cheese pieces,
a few at a time, processing until smooth. Transfer mixture to
medium bowl. Cover; refrigerate 1 hour. Fold whipped topping
into cream cheese mixture. Set aside. In large shallow dish,
dissolve espresso powder in the hot water; add the cold water.
Quickly dip cake slices into espresso, turning to coat all sides.
Arrange slices in bottom of 13x9 inch baking dish or 12 cup
shallow dish, smoothing with fingers to mold cake slices
together. Sprinkle with half of the chopped chocolate. Top
with chilled cream cheese mixture. Sprinkle with remaining
chocolate. Cover; refrigerate at least 3 hours or overnight
before serving. Store in refrigerator.
Yield: 12 Servings
Category: Desserts
v v v v v
Remember that starting today
you should
write "Year of the Ox"
on your checks
instead of
"Year of the Rat."
The Top 8 Ways to Celebrate the Year of
the Ox
8> Get plowed.
7> Swear off steaks, but carpet the basement with D-Con to make
up for last year.
6> Put on a bow and have an incident.
5> Join the Teamsters.
4> Tic-Tac-Toe Tournaments.
3> Get your ox off.
2> Drink draught beer.
and the Number 1 Way to Celebrate the Year of the Ox...
1> Go out to your favorite night spot for a little carry-yokey.
v v v v v
10+ essential (and free) Windows applications, from George Ou - Downloads - TechRepublic
Overview: When George Ou builds a new Windows computer, he installs a dozen of his favorite free apps.
Not only do they fill essential functions, they're all well-behaved installers and uninstallers:
no crashing the computer or gunking it up. See how to make the most of your computer without
spending a dime on software. For a graphical look at each product, check out this photo gallery
Recuva is a freeware Windows utility to restore files that have been accidentally deleted from your computer,
including files emptied from the Recycle bin, deleted files from digital camera memory cards
or MP3 players, and files lost by bugs, crashes and viruses.
License: Free
OS: Windows
A clever tool that automatically saves your working documents at a
specified time interval,
reducing the chance of data loss if applications crash.
License: Free
OS: Mac OS X 10.5.5 or later
A command line utility that allows you to delete one or more files
and/or directories, or
to cleanse the free space on a disk.
License: Free to try
OS: Windows NT/2000
New wallpapers from worldstart
http://www.lockergnome.com/windows/2008/10/21/pictomio-v1223/
Pictomio is a software application for managing, categorizing, searching, and archiving
photos and other media files, and allows you to generate animated 2D and 3D slideshows.
The extensive capabilities of the latest programmable 3D graphic cards are utilized for image
decoding and displaying slideshows.
The Pictomio software is composed of three parts: a photo browser and [...]
v v v v v
"Earlier today,
President Obama, Vice President Joe Biden,
and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton all appeared together
at a press conference. There was an awkward moment when both
men realized they were wearing the same suit as Hillary."
Conan O'Brien
v v v v v
v v v v v
Morris complained to his friend Irving, that love
making with his
wife was becoming routine and boring.
"Get creative Morris. Break up the monotony. Why
don't you try 'playing doctor' for an hour? That's
what I do," said Irving.
"Sounds great," Morris replied,
"but how do you make it last for an hour?"
"Just keep her waiting For 45 minutes!"
v v v v v
Paddy and Mick were both laid off, so they went to the unemployment office.
When asked his occupation, Paddy answered, "Knicker Stitcher. I
sew da elastic onto ladies' knickers and thongs."
The clerk looked up Knicker Stitcher on his computer and, finding it
classified as unskilled labor, he gave him 80 dollars a week
unemployment pay.
Mick was next in and when asked his occupation replied, "Diesel
Fitter."
Since a diesel fitter was a skilled job, the clerk gave Mick 160
dollars a week.
When Paddy found out he was furious. He stormed back into the
office to find out why his friend and co-worker was collecting double
his pay.
The clerk explained, "Knicker Stitchers are unskilled labor and
Diesel Fitters are skilled labor."
"What skill?" yelled Paddy. "I sew da elastic on da knickers and
thongs, then Mick puts 'em over his head and says, "Yep, diesel
fitter'."
v v v v v
v v v v v
BADVETTE87
"Hillary Clinton may
take the job of secretary of state.
The secretary of state serves at the pleasure of the
president. To which Bill Clinton said, 'Yeah, that'll be a first.'"
v v v v v
"I have good news
and bad news," the defense attorney told
his client. "First the bad news. The blood test came back,
and your DNA is an exact match with that found at the crime
scene."
"Oh, no!" cried the client. "What's the good news?"
"Your cholesterol is only 140."
v v v v v
"The U.S.
Department of Education has a new slogan: Our
students may be behind the rest of the world, but they're
on top of their teachers."
Jay Leno
v v v v v
Restart Times
Have you ever wondered how often you should shut down your computer and then restart it?
I don't know about all of you, but there's always been a question in my mind about how many
times a week (or day or month, etc.) I should be restarting my computer. I mean, does every
computer need a certain amount of rest time or are they more durable than we may think?
Well, allow me to explain some of your options!
To be honest, there really isn't a certain time frame set up for computers when it comes to
shutting down and restarting them. There's no minimum or maximum requirement for any computer.
Now, if your computer is requesting you to restart it (for example, after an update), you should oblige,
but otherwise, it's not going to harm your computer to leave it on for an extended period of time.
The only time I can think of when you should be restarting your computer on a regular
basis is when you're having some system problems. The restart function often helps troubleshoot certain issues.
Restarting your computer can really help fix any abnormal problems your computer may be experiencing as well.
That probably happens more often than you think. So, while it's a good idea to shut down your computer every
once in awhile (just to give it a breather), you don't have to do it every single day.
I'd say once a week is a good rule to go by. Of course, do what you want,
but I urge you to keep this tip in mind as well. That's all I have to say about that!
Erin - worldstart.com
v v v v v
"Today was Hillary Clinton's first day
as secretary of state.
She's now in charge of all foreign affairs. Bill Clinton will
still handle all domestic affairs."
Craig Ferguson
v v v v v
The teenager was developing rapidly, so her
mother thought it about
time that she understood the facts of life.
"Liza," she began, "I think it would be nice if we had a little
chat
about how life is formed. As you know, a baby grows in a lady's tummy
and..."
"It might be interesting to hear you tell it, Mom," interrupted the
daughter, "but what I really want to know is how to fake an orgasm."
v v v v v
Two's company, three's an adult film
v v v v v
ShaynaButtons
Bryan Berg - Cardstacker What's that title mean, you ask? Well, it means exactly what it says!
The cool site we're featuring on our homepage today is called Cardstacker and it's all about
cardstacker himself Bryan Berg. The Web site is filled with his cardstack creations and let me tell you,
they are simply amazing. I can't even imagine how he does what he does,
but I'm so glad he does, because they are so fun to look at. If you want in on the
cardstacking fun too, just follow the link below and check it out!
Best Places to Live: Compare the Best Cities & Small Towns for You!
This is a very fun online quiz that helps you figure out where you should live, work, and even retire.
It free and fun. You start by checking one of the three options of community size then click "find my spot"
vlingo Vlingo is a voice-powered user interface that unlocks access to mobile phone wireless data services.
vlingo for iPhone™ and vlingo for BlackBerry smartphones allows users to speak into their device
and have many popular applications carry out their respective functions. This includes dialing your phone,
sending an email or SMS, creating and saving a memo or task, opening a web browser and performing a web search,
composing a social-networking status message and more. It's all possible with technology by vlingo —
revolutionary software that translates your voice into text like nothing before.
v v v v v
A woman said to her friend, "I don't
know what to do. My
husband is such a mess maker that you can't imagine. He
doesn't put anything in its place, I am always going around
the house organizing things."
The friend says, "Take a tip from me. The first week after
we were married I told my husband firmly, 'Every glass and
plate that you take, wash when you are done and put back in
its place.'"
The first woman asked, "Did it help?"
Her friend said, "I don't know. I haven't seen him since."
v v v v v
BADVETTE87
The little boy wasn't getting good marks in school. One day
he made the teacher quite surprised. He tapped her on the
shoulder and said, "I don't want to scare you, but my daddy
says if I don't get better grades, somebody is going to get
a spanking."
v v v v v
Letting the cat out of the bag is a whole lot easier than putting it back in.
v v v v v
BADVETTE87
There was a little boy who was learning how
to count. He had mastered
the halfway point to a hundred, but was having some problems
afterward. One day, he was counting, and he got to 58... 59, and
asked what came next. Mom told him, "Sixty. Sixty is the next
number." When he got to 69, he asked, "What comes after 69?"
His
father was just walking in the door from work, heard only the
question, and he replied, "Listerine!"
v v v v v
Being a good dog owner is no pawblem, but being a GRRREAT dog owner requires a little extra attention.
If you and your dog have promised each other that 2009 is the year to change for the better,
then Dogster has the resources that will
help you succeed.
Woof. You. Can. What are you waiting for?
Start being a better dog owner now ››
Veterinarians used to believe that dogs saw only in black and white, but recent studies
suggest that they actually do have some color vision—but it's not as bright as a human's.
As it turns out, dogs have only 20% of the cone photoreceptor cells—the part of the
eye that controls the perception of color—that humans have.
Meet the Weimaraner
So sleek-bodied is the Weimaraner that its gray coat often
looks like it's been painted on.
And although these graceful and friendly canines are very intelligent,
their stubbornness can sometimes mask their smarts.
They love attention and long for VIP status -- either within a
family or as an owner's companion.
Keep in mind that proper training requires an owner to walk a fine line between asserting a leadership role early on –
to prevent willfulness and aggressive behavior toward other dogs -- and not disciplining too severely,
which can make Weimaraners uneasy and wary. Their boundless energy makes them a good match
for people who are active, but a not-so-good fit for those who
have smaller dogs or young children.
Pedigree We all bring dogs into our lives
knowing that they will probably not outlive us.
Yet when a beloved dog dies, we're often unprepared for the overwhelming sadness it brings.
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The Top 7 Signs Your New
Co-Worker Used to Be a Supermodel
7> She's the only one who doesn't make a mad dash to the
conference room for leftover pastries.
6> Complains about the lighting in the conference room not
bringing out her good side.
5> "Heidi, get down off the conference table. It's not a
catwalk."
4> He's the only grease monkey at Jiffy Lube wearing Prada
coveralls.
3> Screams every few minutes, the inevitable result of
preparing
McDonald's fries while wearing lingerie.
2> She scheduled a "purge meeting" right after the
"lunch
meeting."
and the Number 1 Sign Your New
Co-Worker Used to Be a
Supermodel....
1> Every two minutes she leaves her cubicle and returns in a
different outfit.
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Anxiety and Panic Disorders Center: Panic Attacks, Phobias, and Treatments for Anxiety Disorders
Anxiety is a normal human emotion that we all experience. But when panic and anxiety symptoms
escalate into anxiety attacks and panic attacks, it may be an anxiety disorder. Anxiety disorders include
generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety, and panic disorder. There is excellent treatment for anxiety attacks,
as well as panic attack symptoms, including medication and psychotherapy.
Coffee Cuts Stroke Risk in Women Regular coffee consumption reduces the risk of stroke in women,
according to a new study. The study, published in Circulation: Journal of the American Heart Association,
shows that women who drank four or more cups of coffee a day had a 20% reduced risk of stroke compared
to women who had less than one cup per month. Drinking two to three cups per day reduced risk by 19%.
Drinking a cup five to seven times a week reduced risk by 12%.
Multiple Sclerosis: Play MS Online Games
Play this series of fun games while you collect tips on treating and living with MS
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A recent study found that 35% of men have been injured while
undoing a woman's bra.
That's correct. While unfastening a woman's stabilizing devise, men have
received strained tendons, scratches, and other similar injuries.
Actually, I can vouch for that.
I got injured today while trying to undo a woman's bra.
When I undid the woman in front of me in the checkout line, she turned and hit
me with a can of peas.
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BADVETTE87
Ralph came home drunk
one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep
slumber.
He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, 'You died in
your sleep, Ralph...'
Ralph was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live
for. Send me back!'
St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back,
and that is as a chicken.'
Ralph was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near
his home..
The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking,
and pecking the ground.
A rooster strolled past. 'So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first
day here?'
'Not bad,' replied Ralph the hen, 'but I have this strange feeling
inside. Like I'm gonna explode!'
'You're ovulating,' explained the rooster. Don't tell me you've never
laid an egg before? '
'Never,' said Ralph.
'Well, just relax and let it happen,' says the rooster. 'It's no big
deal.'
Ralph did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg!
Ralph was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood.
He soon laid another
egg -- his joy was overwhelming.
As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of
his head, and heard his wife yell.....
'Ralph! Wake up. You shit the bed!'
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How to tell whether or not you are ready to have children!
THE MESS TEST:
Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Now rub your
hands in the wet flowerbed and rub on the walls. Cover the stains
with crayons. Place a fish stick behind the couch and leave it
there all summer.
THE TOY TEST:
Obtain a 55-gallon box of Legos. (If Legos are not
available, you
may substitute roofing tacks or broken bottles.) Have a friend
spread them all over the house. Put on a blindfold. Try to walk to
the bathroom or kitchen. Do not scream. (This could wake a
sleeping child.)
THE GROCERY STORE TEST:
Borrow one or two small animals (goats are best) and take them
with you as you shop at the grocery store. Always keep them in
sight and pay for anything they eat or damage.
THE DRESSING TEST:
Obtain one large, unhappy, live octopus. Stuff into a small net bag,
making sure that all arms stay inside.
THE FEEDING TEST:
Obtain a large plastic milk jug. Fill halfway with water. Suspend
from the ceiling with a stout cord. Start the jug swinging. Try to
insert spoonfuls of soggy cereal (such as Fruit Loops or Cheerios)
into the mouth of the jug, while pretending to be an airplane. When
finished, dump the contents of the jug on the floor.
THE NIGHT TEST:
Prepare by obtaining a small cloth bag and fill it with 8-12 pounds
of sand. Soak it thoroughly in water. At 8 PM begin to waltz and
hum with the bag until 9 PM. Lay down your bag and set your
alarm for 10pm. Get up, pick up your bag, and sing every song
you have ever heard. Make up about a dozen more and sing these
until 4 am. Set alarm for 5 am. Get up and make breakfast. Keep
this up for 5 years. Look cheerful.
THE PHYSICAL TEST (WOMEN):
Obtain a large beanbag chair and attach it to your front under your
clothes. Leave it there for 9 months. Now remove 10 of the beans.
THE PHYSICAL TEST (MEN):
Go to the nearest drugstore. Set your wallet on the counter. Ask
the clerk to help himself. Now proceed to the nearest food store.
Go to the head office and arrange for your paycheck to be directly
deposited to the store. Purchase a newspaper. Go home and read
it quietly for the last time.
THE FINAL ASSIGNMENT:
Find a couple who already has a small child. Lecture them on how
they can improve their discipline, patience, tolerance, toilet training,
and child's table manners. Suggest many ways they can improve.
Emphasize to them that they should never allow their children to run
rampant.
Enjoy this experience. It will be the last time you have all the answers.
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Did you ever notice that when you fall in
love, you sink into his arms??
But after the wedding your arms are in his sink??
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ICE BOUND
A Doctor's Incredible Battle for Survival at the South Pole
by Dr. Jerri Nielson
"Ice Bound" is the inspiring true story of Dr. Jerri Nielsen, the physician with breast cancer
stranded at a South Pole research station, whose amazing rescue made headlines around the globe.
Set in a remote and desolate yet strikingly beautiful landscape,
Nielsen's narrative of her transforming experience is a thrilling adventure.
Wonderful book! You can't fathom what people at the South Pole go through! A definite
'must read - it's true and it's amazing - trust me!
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Mother of 14. Eight newborns and six
preschoolers. 'Nuff said.
The Top 9 Things Nadya Suleman Needs to Know
9> Only four more until Nike will let you open her own
shoe-factory.
8> Somewhere, an LA pediatrician is dancing a jig.
7> Saving for college is best done early; she should have started
somewhere around 1952.
6> $5/hour seems like a good rate for a babysitter, but read the
fine print: It's $5 per hour per child.
5> The garbage company will chip in for relocation if you move
closer to the landfill.
4> It's spelled: T-U-B-A-L L-I-G-A-T-I-O-N.
3> She's gonna need a stroller the size of a 747.
2> Timesaver: Make batches of formula in bulk. Like in a kiddie's
wading pool.
and the Number 1 Thing Nadya Suleman Needs to Know...
1> Damn those Gosselins for getting all the lucrative TV/Book
deals first!
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jacksinfla
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"My uncle ran for Congress last year."
"Really? What does he do now?"
"Nothing. He got elected."
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A man and his wife were talking and he says,
"You know, I was thinking of going down to the bar tonight
and entering that big-dick contest."
"Oh honey," she exclaims, "I don't want you taking that out in
public!"
"But sweet thing," he says, "the prize is $100!"
"I don't care," she says, "I don't want you showing that thing
to everybody."
So he lets the subject drop until the following night when his wife walks in on
him in the bedroom,
counting out a hundred dollars.
"Did you go down and enter that big-dick contest last night after I told
you not to?"
"Please forgive me, sweetheart," he says.
"You mean you took that thing out for everybody to see?" she says,
tears welling up in her eyes.
The man looks at her fondly and says, "Only enough to win."
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"Very bad news today: The porn industry is asking for a $5
billion bailout. Gives a whole new meaning to 'give it to
me!' This whole porn collapse would never have happened
under Clinton." -Craig Ferguson
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Which Operating System To Use? - Forbes.com
Is it safe to embrace Microsoft's Vista operating system, or should you wait for Windows 7?
Let me try to sort this out for you.
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Being married or single is a choice we all have to make.
It's not a great choice....it's sort of like when the
the doctor says "Ointment or suppositories?"
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"It was a historic day when all four of our living presidents
and our president-elect had lunch together at the White House.
There was an awkward moment when Carter asked Obama to bring
him more bread." Jimmy Kimmel
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Chocolate Coffee Shake
1 shot dark Creme de Cocoa
1/2 shot Bailey's Irish Cream
1 shot Kahlua
1 shot milk or 1 small scoop vanilla ice cream
1 chocolate candy bar (optional)
1 scoop ice
BLEND WELL - Garnish with cherry
Tahitian Treat
1 oz Bacardi Limon
1 oz Amaretto
4 oz Cranberry juice
Fill with Sprite
Ice cubes
Fill highball glass with ice. Add liquor,
juice and then Sprite
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The Top 14 Ways Hell is Better Than Your Job
14. Your coffee stays hot all day!
13. Never have to look very far to find the legal department.
12. In hell, you *know* who drank your Coke in the fridge - Satan!
11. 30 percent fewer "Dilbert" cartoons in the break room.
10. In hell, that devil-may-care attitude of yours comes in
handy.
9. You get to spend more time with your spouse now.
8. No more wondering if the boss hates you.
7. Riding to work in a hand basket beats the hell out of public transportation.
6. Hourly dunks in searing pools of molten lava actually quite invigorating.
5. Surfing porno sites all day scores *major* points with the boss!
4. Your office: One free stale donut every Friday.
Hell: One brutal mutilation of a "Full House" cast member every
Friday.
3. Your job? Suit and tie. Hell? Pitchforks and attitude, Baby!
2. Ferocious reptilian demons can appreciate a good dirty
joke now and then without threatening a sexual harassment
complaint.
1. Microwave popcorn -- without leaving your cubicle!
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jacksinfla
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Sign At A Laundry Shop:
"How about we refund your money, send you a new one at no
charge,
close the store and have the manager shot. Would that be
satisfactory?"
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"The thrill is gone from my marriage," one buddy
told another.
"Why not add some intrigue to your life and have an affair?"
"But what if my wife finds out?"
"Heck, this is a new age we live in. Go ahead and tell her
about it!"
So the guy went home and said, "Dear, I think an affair will
bring us closer together."
"Forget it," said his wife. "I've tried that so many times
and it never worked."
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Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
And planned to do some kissing.
Jack made a pass
And grabbed her ass
Now two of his teeth are missing
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KP1983
Beautiful
The Friendship Page ..for every friendship!
Just for friendship
Acquaintace or friend: building close friendships.
How to...
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pavanco1
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"Bad news for the octuplet mom, Nadya Suleman. The house
where she lives with her mom is in foreclosure. If she
loses the house, Nadya will be forced to get pregnant
again so she can live in the hospital for another three
months." -Jimmy Kimmel
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XXX
I have not visited these sites
Enter at your own risk!
Daily Ding Dong
Snatch Of The Day!
"Daily Wet Dream"
Surfer's Corner!
Back Door
Curly Fan
Amateur Screw
Joe Cool
Try This
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Another issue on it's way to YOU! and another one
already in the making!
So meet us back
here next week, same time - same place
but remember, no matter where you are or what you are doing,
never,
ever,
EVER
forget to
keep on rockin'
it's a state of mind
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©1999 - 2008 - Deborah Austin - All
rights reserved and held by Rockin' and Rollin'
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